See what I did there?

Did you guys know that this Jason Worth character grew a beard this off-season? Also his hair is kind of long, too. As a matter of fact, he closely resembles Jeff Bridges from that one movie he was in!

We all know Werf hasn’t been very forthright with information about his choice of coiffure; preferring just to let his mane speak for itself (which it has, at length.) My good pal Dave Brown was ballsy enough to ask Jayson if he could touch it, just to prove that it was real. Spoiler alert: hell no.

But just how far has Beard Mania™ gone? Well, pretty gosh darn far. Far enough that the bigwigs at the venerable Topps Trading Card Company have taken notice and may consider preserving the legacy that is Jayson Werth’s Beard in a very, shall we say, personal manner. Check out how after the jump.

Topps kicks a whole lot of ass right now. Their exclusivity agreement with MLB has raised the hackles of a few members of the baseball card collecting community (Yeah, they’re still out there,) but the fact that Topps has churned out some seriously awesome sets over the past few years and seriously endeared them to me. Sure, the 2010 Series 1 cards might be some of the most beautiful card designs I’ve seen in a decade but their other, lesser known sets like National Chicle, Topps Heritage, and Allen and Ginter throw back to years gone by while expanding on exactly what is a baseball card.

In case you thought I was kidding...

After the trading card market collapsed, card manufacturers turned to insert cards to incite collectors into ripping more and more wax. Inserts have evolved from simple “gold cards” to elaborate gimmicks such as cards printed on silk, cuts of game used merchandise, or the actual printing plates used to make the card. In the 2009 Allen and Ginter set, which is known for featuring not only ballplayers but historical figures, athletes from other sports, and animals,  Topps went one step further and included honest to God DNA on an incredibly limited number of cards. I remember freaking out when I pulled a gold foil Mike Lieberthal card in elementary school. I’m not sure how I would have felt then if I pulled the Napoleon Bonaparte Hair Sample Relic.

I tell you all that so I can tell you this:

I contacted Topps through Twitter to see if they had any plans on featuring our favorite facial hair in their updated set of cards that comes out halfway through the season. Turns out, thanks to your pal Redmund and Topps, you may soon be able to own a part of the most important beard in the history of Southeastern Pennsylvania:

My original tweet, a response to a question about preseason baseball:

Topps’ first  response:

Me again, not being able to let go of a joke until it’s beaten to death:

Finally, Topps:

BONUS NON-BEARD COVERAGE:

In addition to baseball, I have a bit of an obsession with sunglasses. I blame it on the fact that I have some crazy weird degenerative eye disease, but my girlfriend blames it on me being a huge homosexual. Either way, Not long after I tweeted the above pic of Werf commenting about how much I liked his shades when a rep from the company responded to let me know the make and model. Turns out Jayson’s rocking Kaenon Hard Kores in a custom white and red colorway. Unfortunately, and I truly may be the only one who cares about this, Kaenon doesn’t actually sell the white frames. Just a heads up, guys: put these out at retail in the Delaware Valley and you won’t be able to keep them on the shelves. We’re all a bit weird like that.

Oh, and if you want to toss me a pair of Hard Kore Large for introducing your brand to literally dozens of new customers, I’d be totally cool with that. You too, Topps.